he’ll be there with bells on

…but probably nothing else.

We’ve already established that Thing 2 (yes, they’re back on Thing status) prefers naked to any other state of being. He also happens to be a music lover. Today, in order to distract me from his lack of attention to task-at-handedness, which was, you guessed is, room cleaning, he decided to put on a one-man-band-in-the-buff show. Quite the site, I must say. Bells on both ankles, egg shaker in on hand, harmonica in the other, and a slide whistle in his mouth. Noisy and nude stomping through the house.

“I tried to put the bells on my guy (his name for his penis)” he said, “but they wouldn’t stay on. See?” At which time, well, you can imagine the frustration of the poor boy trying to velcro the wrist/ankle bells onto his genitalia. And me without my camera. His father will be so disappointed.

Yes folks, we’re currently embattled again in Mom v. Kidletts over whether the bedroom really does need to be clean enough to navigate without the lights on or not. I am currently losing. Again. I could really use some support here, and I know that there are at least a couple of people reading this crap, so COMMENT DAMN YOU!  And yes, sister love, that one was aimed at you. I’m in great need of some moral support, especially seeing as though I’m not getting the nicotine support these days, and there’s only so much carbohydrate support I can take before I support myself into an insulin coma.



  1. Alright sister dear… this one’s for you! Order pizza and those yummy desert pizza items, and all will be well. Not necessarily clothed or attractive, but emotionally well and carbohydrate loaded. Then everyone needs to go to bed-yes, you, too- for the sugar crash will be deafening and catastrophic in many ways. Tomorrow, when you wake up with that sugar (and whatever else you indulged in after the little ones went to bed, even though I warned you to go to bed immediately) hangover, just grit your teeth, lock the Things in their boxes, and clean up after them like the rest of us do. The following morning you may begin again with your attempt to raise them to clean up better than you do. After all, everybody’s doing it, and why are you so reluctant anyway??

  2. Reluctant, reluctant? I’m on a first name basis with the pizza delivery staff! There is no reluctance, merely a fear of not waking up from the coma. But thank you for your kind and loving support. Now why the hell did I have to wait so damn long? I joined facebook for you!

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